Mischif no Snark: Upskirt Mama & Little Brother Junkie 5


Hello all you perverts and pervettes! Ah who am I kidding, no girls read this blog. Anyway – I’m Jeremy, but you can call me Mischif, and I’m a new writer for Onii-chan no Ecchi! I’ve been lurking here and there for about six months or so, commenting every now and again, and when Randall sent out a call for new contributors, I jumped all over it. Now I’m here, and I hope you don’t mind if I write some stuff for you guys.

Anyway, I was wracking my brain trying to think of something really nice to write about, and in the end I decided to take a page from Randall’s book and snark about something, and it just so happened that I managed to come across two doujins that are prime and ready to be snarked – to hold onto something as we delve into what I’m going to call “Mischif no Snark”.

Okay, first up we have “Upskirt Mama”, a shota doujin that starts with a duet of panty shots on the first page and a sound effect of a skirt flying up – so far, so good. Apparently the doujin starts at the end of a tennis lesson, as on page three we see multiple women in only underwear in the locker room. We also find out just how lucky the protagonist is, as he is yanked inside the locker room to have attention lavished on him by multiple women.

Of course, since this is a doujin, the women’s conversation turns toward sex. One woman asks the main female (hereafter referred to as the main) whether his dick has been taken care of (I don’t know why she would think the main would know this, he’s 11 and she’s at least three times that) and after giving the reader confirmation that the protagonist is the main’s son (which would be squicky if we weren’t all perverts), gives the main some of the worst parenting advice ever. And she decides to take it.

So after deciding that the best early Christmas gift would be an Oedipal complex, she brings him closer under the pretense of wiping her sweaty back. Now, this wouldn’t have been that bad if the camera hadn’t gone all fisheye and low-angled which makes her ass look huge

So now she’s topless and his dick’s hard, and the reader learns two things: one, incest gets her hot; and two, her pussy can say the word “wet”.

She decides to make the first move, and pulls some “mommy loves you” bullshit while stroking him through his pants. Then she finally gets the nerve to pull it out and…

Whoa. Hold on – he’s eleven and you expect me to believe his dick is three hand-widths wide? Seriously? Is there some sort of incest gene that makes your dick huge when you’re young? Because I totally wish I had it. Anyway, she starts to give him a blowjob and can’t fit the tip in her mouth. Then he starts licking her panties and we find out that apparently her vagina can say “lick” too. Then we pull out for another shot that makes her ass look like it could defeat Godzilla…

…and she finally decides that she wants him to JAM IT IN. Fuck noises are made and she realizes how good it feels for him to be back inside her vagina, and when he comes she wants to make him a brother-son. And when it’s all over we get some scene out of some Charles Manson-ish Aesop.

Cut to a cafe who knows how later and the other women want the main to tweet the deets while she’s sparking like a fucking Twilight vampire on the face of the sun. One of the women gets a bit jealous and begins to proposition the protagonist, but the main steps in to protect him. Yeah, it’s a little too late for that. The end!

Next up, Little Brother Junkie, another shota that starts with a pretty big bang as…

…what looks to be an eleven year-old girl breaks through a locked door to get to her brother, who looks quite like a girl himself. But she doesn’t really care, since he’s Kawaii As Fuck® and she just want to cuddle with him and lick his neck and shit. He gets tired of her licking on his neck and asks if there’s anything he can do to get her off him. Come to think of it, there is something she’s wanted to do…

…which is dress the protagonist up as a girl, makeup and all. Here’s where I read between the lines a little bit and assume she’s a lesbian, since dressing her little brother up as a pretty pretty princess makes her wetter than the Hoover Dam.

After finding out his big sister is sopping wet, his dick makes its first appearance from inside a pair of panties I don’t really think an eleven year-old should be wearing, and she decided to give him a titwank because his penis is “cute”. Seriously. Anyway, fuck noises are made, she swallows like a champ, and she must have magical tits since after what must be only 30 seconds she gets him hard again. She calls his penis “cute” again (sidebar: women who may be reading this – a man’s dick is never “cute”. Think up a masculine word and use that instead, please) and decides a titwank must not be “cute” enough, as she gets on top of him and rides him like a rodeo show. Here’s where I think the best line in the doujin comes up:

“It’s almost like you’re violating me.” Except since you’re older than him and you’re the one who initiated this whole ordeal, you’re actually the one violating him. I guess that’s where the almost comes in. Back to the story, we realize he’s just a two-pump chump and she wants to have a brother-son of her own since she makes him come inside her, and after this is all done…

…yep, it’s all back to normal. At the end, we find that she’s not just an incestuous older sister, she’s also an amateur photographer…with an urge to spread her brother’s “cuteness” on the internet. At least he’s old enough to know what the word “blackmail” means.

And that’s it! I hope you enjoyed yourself after the first of what I hope to be many editions of “Mischif no Snark”. Please feel free to tell me how I’m doing and what you’d like to see me snark on another time in the comments.


5 thoughts on “Mischif no Snark: Upskirt Mama & Little Brother Junkie

  • Tom Jones

    Bloody good show m’lad, I thoroughly enjoyed your snark on that doujin. :D

    I love it when sentences go wrong. “Almost violating”… Brilliant! :)

    It’d be great to read more of your stuff again. (Good job)

  • Incognitonymous

    To be honest, I wasn’t expecting this to be good. I mainly read it to convince myself that it’s bad and I shouldn’t waste my time on articles written by these new people.

    You proved me wrong. Not only was this entertaining and funny, but it was very well-written. Kudos to you, sir. Kudos. Looking forward to more posts from you.

  • OhHaiI'maGirl

    Look! *points to self* A girl that reads this blog! :D

    Anywho, I may be a “pervette”, as you put it, but the stuff on this site is just way too funny. It’s always a good read.

    Thank you for some fun laughs!

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