Ask Onii-chan: Family Ties

So, new layout. Took me a few hours to hack something together off of unsleepable, which is a theme… it’s got some stupid footer shit. Feel free to ignore it. The quickpoll will be up until tomorrow night and then I will pull it down and put the futanari poll back up. I guess it is Friday now in most of the world, but to hell with it, I was busy. OK?! So I will be doing my Thursday/Friday Ask Onii-chan now. Today’s question is:

Should I tell my parents that I look at hentai?

Is this a serious question, some of you might be asking? I don’t know, but hey, I will work on the assumption that it is, as I grew up in the bible belt and a lot of people felt that there were things that their parents needed to know that their parents obviously either didn’t want to know or liked to pretend their kids never did. But let me move along to the things I see as the root of this question.

I think this question is coming from the same sort of standpoint (not exactly the same) as being a closeted gay person. I think that maybe there is some burning need to express to people you care about that you feel passionately about something. I could be off base there, but that’s just the sort of vibe I get from people who generally want to seek the approval of a loved one. It does offer a very deeply ingrained form of validation to have your parents hear about things you feel strongly about and approve, but this also sort of points to what I would consider to be a general lack of independence.

As to the immediate question, no, I do not thing that you should bring this up to your parents, and the reason for this is a fairly simple reason. Ask yourself this: Do your parents WANT to know that you watch hentai? Do parents EVER want a catalogue of the pornography that their children are consuming? I highly doubt it. More to the point, if your parents are not the understanding sorts, it could lead to all sorts of home problems that just aren’t necessary. You’d be burdening yourself with something that wholly doesn’t concern your parents, much like your bedroom manner with a specific girl. Should you tell your parents that you just tried anal for the first time? No. Basically, I can’t think of a single thing either party gains from this newfound and highly intimate knowledge.

What things do I think ARE important to you to take from this answer? I would have to say that you need to consider the information flow that you share with your parents, as in the current mindset you could in up in a very, very dependent relationship with them which could lead to issues when you finally do want to break out on your own. I’ve seen firsthand the sorts of awkward situations people end up in when they don’t form a solid shield between child/parent and adult/parent relationships. I’ve known 28 year old men who get told what to do by their parents from across the country. It’s not a good state of affairs, and it’s something you will want to make sure you avoid like the plague going forward. Supposed you have very laid back parents, this advice runs a bit differently, since they will likely respect your independence to begin with.

Also, just to cover the bases here, if you actually DO insist on telling your parents, I can only say that you shouldn’t at all be surprised at odd or negative reactions and the possibility of getting into some amount of trouble if your parents are the type who run the rail against sexual interests. I would say that the best way to do the whole thing would be to bring it up in a relaxed atmosphere when the conversation could be deemed relevant. One thing I would stress above all else, however, is that you DO NOT go into any sort of detail. Do not bring up specific fetishes, do not bring up visual aids, just give a cursory overview of what the whole thing is and possibly some logically sound reasons for enjoying it (they are women who are drawn to be visually pleasing, they look much more interesting than real woman, and that sort of thing). I mean, don’t start the one man show about 2D porn. Just, if you’re probed about it, then give details. Otherwise, just mention it. If things turn south, which is possible, you will likely want to stick to a line of replies that focus on the positive aspects of WHY you brought it up, and nothing defending the art form itself. Defending the art will just dig the whole if they’re already against it. Say things along the lines of “I just wanted to tell you because it’s something that I like and has an impact on me and I wanted you, my parents, to know about me and things I am passionate about.” Again, I’d recommend against this course of action anyway. Just thought I’d give you my two cents on that, since it has certainly crossed your mind.

I hope this was helpful, and again, if anyone has any stories or comments related to this question, please feel free to post them up in the comments.

Onii-chan is, once again, writing his own thing telling you to fucking contact him and ask questions. He loves you guys, but by god you don’t send enough questions. He’ll be doing updates on Tuesdays and Thursdays if he gets questions that are good enough to answer. If he doesn’t, he’ll just say bollocks to the lot of you and go yank a rubbery one.